What does a sensible girl do when her husband plummets headfirst into the deepest, darkest pig slurry reservoir in the whole of England, possibly the world never to be seen again?

What does she do about the family firm and his obsession - the manuscript that reeks of pig and warns that the world is about to end?

How will she convince her staff that she is a good egg, on their side and not one to be afraid of and how should they celebrate the phenomenal success of the smelly manuscript and the End of Time?

Why party, of course, first one, in house, private, for Celtic employees, an ice-breaker, a getting to know you affair, no outsiders.

Then on the day to end all days The Party to End All Parties, The Mother of All Parties, The Party for the End of Time - all day - outdoors - no holds barred.

Who to invite? Why everyone who is anyone, Ellie and Ken, Mel, Pete and his witchy girl friend, Jenny and Fat Joe and her allies, The Youth and foxy Miss Gracenote, plus Carole, the list goes on and on as Ellie cuts and pastes, adding The Bishop, Otto and Devilish-Cannon but someone has deleted the Cornish Wailers, no point in offending them, meanwhile oxen revolve on spits, tankers arrive filled with beer cider and champagne for the ladies the marquee is extended yet again and Olivia prays that her son has not invited his rougher friends, especially the crocodiles.

Ominously it has begun to rain, forty days and forty nights and no one has noticed the rivets stretching as the pig slurry reservoir begins to strain at the seams.